Dealing With Death


            There is a saying, “You can’t get out of this life alive.” And while it appears to be an accurate one, it is actually false.

            As creatures of the material world, it is inevitable that the mortal aspect of all living beings will someday cease to be. The physical body will die. We can try to postpone this event but eventually it will happen. When it happens to someone who has reached an extensive number of years it is easier to handle than when it happens to someone young. The age of the person involved usually determines one’s reactions.

            But the overall mood is the same—sorrow and despair, frustration and pain.

            How can one deal with these feelings?

            At these times it is important that one not remain alone. Community is essential to keep the energy of those involved in survival mode, because the loss of a loved one can cause the death of one left behind. It is not uncommon for a person to be so much in despair that they simply lay down and die. Animals and birds will do the same thing; simply die from the loss and pain within their heart.

            Community, ones friends and family, can take over responsibilities, hold one’s hand and remain beside them as they walk this painful road, keeping those who mourn active and involved in other things until the pain numbs and becomes bearable.

            Religion is often very helpful at this time as its formality and structure presents a certain safety net for the family, allowing them to lean into ritual and prayer for solace. There is comfort in familiarity, comfort in that which has been known and seen before in one’s life. There is comfort in the mantra of familiar prayers and rituals. These are the things one can grasp onto as lifelines, even if one does not usually make them part of their life. Religion and tradition can also present closure which allows the bereaved to put to rest the mortal aspects of the lost, opening them to a new way of viewing their loved one.

            Spirituality is different at this time. How one views the soul and body may not in fact be at all connected to the religion they use in their life. Many believe in reincarnation who are devout Christians, Jews or Muslims. Many believe that the body will not rise from the dead and yet they call themselves Born Again Christians. Many have mixed beliefs in this day and age, in a world where there is more information about belief systems and possibilities in the unknown and the afterlife. And this is okay. For God is a spiritual being and so is Man. So are all living beings inside their adopted shell.

            When a person disappears from view, one must now learn to interact with them in a different way. All beings are creatures of habit. Humans call people daily, facebook them, tweet or message, eat dinner together, live together, work side by side and love and touch each other. They expect their loved one to be there physically interacting within the material world, and so when the person suddenly is not there, and literally disappears from those fields of reference, suddenly those left behind, whether human or animal, find themselves in despair and confusion, and grief, frustration and anger can set in.

            This is definitely not a time to be left completely alone, even if the watching must be done from a short distance away.

            It is also not a time for huge changes in one’s life. Clothes and possessions should not be given away. If one must make space, then these things should be placed in storage until the bereaved are in control of their faculties again and see the world in a better perspective; only then should they address their loved ones’ material goods and determine what to do with them. Also clothes recently worn should be left as such. The smell of a lost love can be soothing until the bereft have had time to stabilize and learn to live without the other. Packing up one’s home and moving is also not a good idea. Try to stay where you are and keep some things the same. There will be plenty of time to change, sift and sort, later on.

            So what of this new way of looking at the one who has physically disappeared?

            What can one do?

            First, it is important to understand that we are spiritual beings, made up of spiritual stuff, just like the Godhead. We are not material beings. We are spiritual beings who have taken up residence in a material body and are having an experience with that. We are like drivers in cars who one day find their car has broken down and now it is time for them to buy a new one. First, we spend some time going over our past car and deciding what the pros and cons of it were, and then we go out and choose another to replace it. Hopefully we move upward in our world with our choice and not downward into constant trouble and expense.

            When the body of a loved one dies and we can no longer view them physically, it is time to learn different ways to interact with them. Those who die in tragedy or fear often spend some time in seclusion in the world of spirit until they have mentally and emotionally recovered from the ordeal of their passing. Yes, the emotional and mental bodies are also spiritual, or unseen by the physical eye.  When they are released from seclusion and healing, they are free to interact with those on the physical plane through their remaining senses. In other words they can use their spirit form to visit their loved ones. For they, too, feel the loss of family and friends but…that being said…their emotional responses to the mortal world will now be tempered with the complete healing influence of their pure spiritual form and so they will not be in emotional and mental pain or agony if they are in fact purely in spirit.

            When tortured souls visit the material world, it is because they are caught and lost between the worlds and it is up to those who are able to, to rescue them and send them on their way to spirit so they can move on with their soul’s journey.

            However, most souls who pass over are free to visit their family and friends and say goodbye or pass on information about their current state of being, in dream state or via those gifted in communicating with the spirit world.

            Usually, the departed will visit within a few weeks and spend time with their loved ones in what seems like dreams but only very real. That is because they are. When one’s body sleeps, one’s soul goes wandering. This is the time for interacting with the spirit world, whether visiting teachers, demi-gods, ancestors, loved ones or other worlds. All are available to the soul.

            Also the departed being may speak audibly to the bereaved and even be felt to have touched them physically. It depends on the emotion of the departed.

            It is actually much easier to be in communication with the physically departed as it is with a materially present individual. One merely has to begin to speak to the person or think about them and they will be there.

            But there comes a time, when that will not be needed by either party involved and that is when the other is ready to incarnate again or go on to other levels of life in spirit.

            It is important to realize that while you may be feeling great pain, your loved one is not. They are, as I have said so many times before, at play in the fields of the Lord. They no longer feel any body pain, or the same kind of emotional loss that you may be feeling. Their connection is the feeling of compassion rather than physical need. Theirs is a more Godlike emotion rather than a human one.

            But, the bottom line is, they are not gone. They are simply not able to be seen clearly with physical eyes. If you close yours eyes and look straight ahead through your third eye—located between your eyebrows—you may be able to see their spiritual presence by viewing the effulgence of their spiritual body which is called an aura. Practise that skill and you might be surprised to be able to see many more individuals around you than you realized were there.

            It is important that the overall lesson of death be learned. Death is not an end, it is a beginning. It is important that each one of you realize you are not supposed to be here forever, you are supposed to be at home with God. There are many levels of heaven in the physical planes and in the spiritual planes. The heavens of the material world are not permanent and must be one day left, but time in those worlds can seem eternal.

            The heavens of the spiritual realms are eternal and all souls need to strive to go there as soon as possible. One should not desire to linger in the material worlds no matter how much good you believe you are doing. For the material world is cyclical and neverending. Its pain is neverending. It will go on and on, seeming to change but always coming back to the same. There is only true growth and permanence in the world of God. That is where all souls need to desire to go.

            So, while you are here, make the best of it, seek out a spiritual relationship with not only God but every living being on the planet. Get used to behaving as you are meant to be, a spirit soul eternally and forevermore. If you learn to do that now, the thought of loss will never enter your mind and you will always be comforted and stable no matter what happens.













About V.L.M.

Author, Editor, Poet, Composer, Environmental Activist, Spiritual Activist
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