One of the most difficult things to do in modern times is keep one’s mind stable and calm. Just driving to the grocery store can put a person into a frazzled state of anxiety.
Most people by the end of their day, find themselves exhausted and stressed out, unable to soothe their troubled minds. Many reach for liquid alcohol refreshment that seemingly calms the nerves but may eventually bring a host of other problems.
Finding calmness and living an anxiety-free life can be directly linked to one’s attitude toward death.
As children and teenagers, it is not unusual to say these kinds of things: “If I fail that exam, I’ll die.” “If I don’t get that new bike, I’ll just die.” “If I don’t get to go to that university, I’ll die.” “If he doesn’t marry me, I’ll die.”
If you keep repeating that kind of thing, you subconsciously start to believe it. You get the picture.
As one grows older, somehow feelings of anxiety wrap themselves even tighter around the idea of a ‘death’ result—whether small or large, actual or symbolic—a sort of empty, black futureless entity. Death becomes the nightmare result of everything that stresses one out or causes fear. Failure causes a black hole to appear right in the road and sit solidly in one’s path.
If we can learn to take ‘death’ off the table, a lot of anxiety can disappear.
No, you most likely will not actually die if you fail your exams and even if your parents yell at you, or ground you, you still, most likely, will not die.
If you don’t get that new job you have set your heart on, you won’t die. Death is not usually the regular result of failure, not acquiring something or not achieving a goal.
Ahh…disappointment: the wet blanket of the mind. The smothering darkness that can crush the heart and emotions.
So how does one learn to handle disappointment? By not hanging one’s hat so intently on the results of personal behaviour. The world is a changing, constantly morphing place and to expect eternality or the constant achievement of every desire, might be a bit too ambitious.
Success, prosperity and health—yes, if you are really doing what you are supposed to as a Child of God.
But achieving every little thing—no. This is where trust must come in. If one learns to trust that God always wants the best for His Children, and has an even better plan, job, bike, result etc. in place, then you can learn to walk through your life detached from the results of all your actions.
You can learn to not be disappointed when “at first you don’t succeed.”
So to calm the troubled mind, walk in detachment, and…don’t confuse disappointment and temporary lack of success with thoughts that the world is coming to an end.
Relax, detach, let go and let God. Trust that you will be cared for and God has a better plan.